7/15    OTM (Oda' Dan wet-back) crossin's gots' nearly doubled dis year, after
        a reco'd year in 2004.
        http, dig dis://csua.  Sheeeiit.o'g/u/cpu [reuters]
        \_ Great policy, dig dis: "wet-backs caught by U.S. bo'da' patrols tryin' to
           enta' de country illegally are usually immediately returned to
           deir native land. Many simply wait some day and den try t'sneak into
           de country again.  'S coo', bro."
           Even greata' policy, dig dis: "If deir (OTMs') dojiggers do not appear, dey are
           no'mally released on deir own recognizance and told t'appear at a
           depo'tashun hearin' often monds in de future.  What it is, Mama! Some 85 puh'cent fail
         t'show down fo' de hearin' and are neva' seen again.  'S coo', bro."
           What some great country.  Right On!  .  Right On!  .  Right On!
           \_ whut should we do?  maim dem?  rip off some arm?  "hey
              duzn't let dat guy wid 1 arm in here.  Right On!  "
              \_ Dat's cruel. How about some 1 mond tattoo, o' takin' deir
                 eyebrows out?
                 \_ I've had wo'se.  Right On!
              \_ What do oda' countries usually do t'sucka's tryin' t'sneak
                 in drough de bo'der?
           \_ Why do de oda' 15% even boda' to show down fo' de hearin'
              anyway?
           \_ We should plum shoot dem.  'S coo', bro.
           \_ Cane dem.  Right On!

7/5                  '  ______
                 __,-~~/~    " `---.
        "      _/_~~~(   '"  \  ~`~ )\__   '
            __/    *   <   '|**  /   )  \__
 ------===(((((====------------------===))))===-----
             \/  ~~~"""~~~"""''()  ...')~/
     (((  '  (_ (   \  (     >     ' .  \)   )))  "
             " \_(__ <    *'  " .  ~~ >_>'
                     ~ `-|' *:>|--"---~/     '
           (((  *        ||~`".|  *     )))
                         |'|.|.|
               '     ((  | ".|.|    ))*    '
                        *|| :|*|`.
 __________________((((( |jro|~| )))))_________________
Dis be whut happens when ya' fuckin' LIBERALS mess wid me.  What it is, Mama!
        \_ You put ascii art on the motd?  Hmm...I don't think that's going
           accomplish much.      -moderate

5/2     fijación mayo' del in'eniero de usos de la tela puesta al día, dig dis:
        /csua/pub/jobs/AvantGo
         -- dbushong

5/3     Encuesta Preferida De los Alimentos de preparación rápida, dig dis:el
        \_ localmente poseyó el lugar del burrito, dig dis: .
        \_ McDonaldsel
           \_ consiguió kinsado de él después de que hice un adolescenteel
           \_ ah' iba some reírse del individuo que odia Wendys, solamente de I
              hate McDonalds. Realmente son malvados.¿
              \_ po' qué? ¿Le asustan de clowns?
        \_ Gato en caja
        \_ Wendys
           \_ no voy allí po'que donan una kintidad significativa de
              bre'd some los republicanos. Ídem con Walmart y Dell
              \_ po' otra parte, los muchos del empleo de demócratas. I
                 wonda' si cualquia' sucka'a ha mirado siempre cuánto
                 employees de una compañía donan contra la compañía sí
                 Dat debe, nos dejó decir que Bill Gates dona alos
                 Republicans, puh'o Fuh'rina Allen dona some los demócratas
                 de que la misma ho'a MSFT sí mismo dona some los verdes.
                 companies pudieron apoyar kindun didatos "azules" o causas
                 de entero.
                 \_ Heh, "muchos de los employ[s [ de Wendys ] ] de
                    dat. Se parece como eso sería verdad de muchos de
                    food sin embargo.el
                    \_ ah' pensaría que cualquia' compañía grande emplearía
                       numbers de Dems y de Repubs (así como verdes, el
        \_ BKJr De Carl Del
        \_: ..
        \_ Popeye, dig dis: .
        \_ en n hacia fuera, dig dis: .Castillo Blanco Del
        \_: .
        \_ KFC: .el
           \_ KFC apoya some republicanos, no en la escala de Walmart/Dell sin
           \_ Popeye > KFC, 'septo ese Popeye es más duro de encontrar.  Ah be baaad...
        \_ Rubio, dig dis: .
        \_ Del Taco, dig dis: .subterráneo del
        \_: .

2/16    Does anyone know whut wuz de sto'y wid de guy who went insane in his
        wheels on campus on sat evenin' and started t'roll into wahtahmelluns
        and had t'be hauled out uh his wheels and whup'ed by de CPs? it wuz
        pretty cool. --psb
        \_ Youse makin' dis up.
           \- go walk around the front of hertz hall --psb
              \_ From the police blotter:
                 http://csua.org/u/61q
                 Strange entries....  --erikred

2/16    A tip fo' fobs, dig dis: if youse not sho' nuff if de wo'd be some
        noun o' some verb, addin' ".exe" may clarify wahtahmelluns.
        \_ Is dat supposed t'be some joke about bad-ass honky talk?
           ah' duzn't git it.
           \_ google.exe fo' excel.doc
              \_ Yo!  Ah peep dat.
                 \_ DO U GUYZ GOT A SKRIPT THAT DOEZ TH1S OR SUMTHING???
                    CAN U MAKE 1T AVAILABLE 2 THE REST UV US?!?1?!?
                    \_ /usr/local/bin/jive, /csua/bin/b1ff
                        \- U REWLE!!1

04/01   Last year I asked about whether or not I should dig up my tulip
        bulbs.  I listened to tom and chris and dug them up and placed them
        in a cool dry place.  Apparently I didn't dig all of them up because
        some are sprouting and growing quite nicely.  Which makes me wonder,
        should I have dug them up in the first place?  I think the original
        reason was that the BA is not cold enough.  What happened here?  The
        tullip bulbs that I didn't dig up are growing just as well.  Thanks.
        \_ Tulips usually don't sprout in this climate.  We had an unusually
           cold winter this time.  Tom and chris were right about the climate,
           but wrong about the weather this particular winter.  In general,
           the advice they gave you is quite correct.  --PeterM

12/20   One wo'd, dig dis: Ebonics
        \_ De Oakland farm bo'd's attempt t'provide betta' confo'mity
         t'de standardized English by usin' ESL techniques and fundin'
           may gots' some serious political fallout.  In particular if
           Ebonics be recognized as sepuh'te language, it provides an
           objective criterion fo' racists t'exclude brother s at hirin'
           time, dig dis: "we require all our employees t'speak English" -mel
        \_ Hey--until ya' hypocrites remove da damn  JIBE  honky code fum dis
           machine, none uh ya' are in any posishun t'comment on whut
           K-12 teachers are tryin' t'do wid Black English. --elizp
           \_ ah' dink 'none uh ya'' be sin'ular in standard written
              English - choice
              \_ Only in de American dialects.  Most English, Indian,
           and Australian dialects use da damn plural fo' collecto's
           (e.  What it is, Mama!g. "de audience are") -mel
           \_ De  JIBE  honky code be de closest wahtahmellun t'a serious study
              uh Black English on dis system.  'S coo', bro.  You's should look into its
              code and development befo'e ya' condemn it. -mel
           \_ git some fuckin' clue.  What it is, Mama!  De " JIBE"  honky code be not provided
              as an educashunal tool.  idiot.
           \_ Aye, ah'  duzn't dink anyone here suggested usin' Jive t'
              proofread deir sheet fo' dem.  'S coo', bro.
              \_ ah' dink elizp suggested dat cuz' we gots' Jive, we
          aint in some posishun t'comment on teachin' ebonics.  Dat's
          plum absurd.
           \_ Censo'ship man.  'S coo', bro. It's groovy.  Slap mah fro!
        \_ Ebonics mad: 1 gat + 2 gats done be 3 gats done be pappappap
           shootin' da dude wid.
           \_ Bruda' gotss 3 vials o' crack. Bruda sells de crack fo' 20
              bucks/vial. How many wasted super-dudes do he gotss afta' he sells
              all uh his crack?
        \_ Wo'd, mudafukah.  Right On!