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| 2009/12/8-2010/1/3 [Recreation/Computer/Games, Recreation/Stripclub] UID:53578 Activity:nil |
12/8 Best and worst jobs:
http://oddee.com/item_96855.aspx (Director of Fun, Brothel QA)
http://oddee.com/item_96873.aspx (Animal masterbator, sewage, etc)
\_ The Brothel QA job is not for everyone. "The applicants are
whittled down to a final six, who are then fXXXed one after the
other ***in a single day*** by Jaime." Not everyone can meet the
job requirement.
\_ But all Persian men can do it. They're descendants of
very "prolific" Persian kings.
\_ 70 a year? Pshaw, I could test one every day easily, probably
two, and I am in my mid-40s.
\_ All I hear is the sound of envy.
\_ Yeah, and I can do 1095 a year if they are hot. But can you
do 6 in the same day as required? I can't. I'm almost 40.
-- PP
\_ Probably not, though I fail to see why they all need to
be tested on the same day.
\_ The Guard at Buckingham Palace job is a "hard" job also. (See pic.) |
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| oddee.com/item_96855.aspx Ben Southall, 34, of Petersfield, beat out nearly 35,000 applicants from around the world for the dream assignment to swim, explore and relax on Hamilton Island in the Great Barrier Reef, while writing a blog to promote the area. He was selected for the $111,000 gig - a six-month contract to serve as caretaker of a tropical Australian island. He now has to live rent-free in a three-bedroom villa, complete with pool. Before getting the job he had to spend four days on the island for an extended interview process, which required applicants to snorkel through crystalline waters, gorge themselves at a beachside barbecue and relax at a spa. He also had to demonstrate his blogging abilities, take swimming tests and sit through in-person interviews. Sleeping on the job and having a lie-in will no longer be a problem for a girl, who has been selected to test out luxury beds for a month and get paid for it. Roisin Madigan, 22, is earning 1,000 to sleep in designer beds every day for a month. The student is helping with a "sleep survey" carried out by luxury bed specialists Simon Horn Ltd. The company sells luxury Savoir Beds, originally made for the Savoy Hotel. General manager Craig Roylance said Roisin will not only provide an objective view of the beds on sale, but will also be part of a look into what brings a good night's sleep. She will spend 10am to 6pm in beds in the company's showroom in Edgbaston, and then will blog about her experiences. Surely the envy of any desk-bound office worker, Tommy Lynch has travelled over 27,000 miles this year for his job, testing holiday resort waterslides. Mr Lynch, 29, works for holiday giant First Choice, checking the height, speed, water quantity and landing of the flumes, as well as all safety aspects. In 2008 Mr Lynch tested waterslides at holiday villages in Lanzarote, Majorca, Egypt, Turkey, Costa Del Sol, Cyprus, Algarve, Dominican Republic and Mexico. This year he will quality control First Choice's new splash resorts in Greece, Turkey, Florida, Jamaica and Ibiza. Liverpool-born Mr Lynch, whose job title is lifestyle product development manager, was recruited to identify the very best pools to be featured in First Choice's new Splash Resort collection. He also ensures potential new resorts are up to the company's standard. Jaime Rascone is no different than the rest of us in that the erstwhile DJ needs to grab the occasional odd job to make ends meet. But the Chilean lothario has beat all of us by holding the type of fantasy job that just sounds too good to be true: Quality Control in a brothel. Rascone, an occasional male model and DJ, first happened upon Fiorella Companions in Santiago, Chile while working on a story about the country's sexual revolution. He was offered the gig by Madam Fiorella, who needed somebody to provide that final "interview" in her hiring process. It goes like this: girls who are interested in working as VIP escorts for Fiorella have to undergo interviews, psychological testing, and a photo session. The applicants are whittled down to a final six, who are then fucked one after the other in a single day by Jaime. He takes diligent notes on, say, how they moved their hips and whether their groans were adequate, and makes recommendations to the madam. The strain of the job is actually such that he can only do it once a month, testing around seventy girls or so a year. Imagine moving to the heart of Sonoma County, where every day you'll come home to more than 450 wineries along the beautiful northern coast of California. Picture living rent free, learning the intricacies of making the perfect wine, and capturing and sharing the entire experience for your network of Twitter followers. Hardy Wallace of Atlanta, the first person to submit his application, was the winner for the position at Murphy-Goode Winery-- a $10,000 p/mo for six months, rent-free job updating Twitter and Facebook with his winery lifestream. The interview process was simple: submit a YouTube video explaining why you would be good for the job and wait to see what happens. Another one of the world's best job has gone to schoolboy Harry Willsher, 12, chief taster in a sweet factory. He got the job after winning a contest at Swizzell's Matlow to find a recruit. According to him, after his first tour at his new job, he felt like having tepped into the book Charlie And The Chocolate Factory. He wowed judges by describing the flavor and smell of his favourite sweet, the Drumstick lolly. The Derby firm, which also makes Love Hearts, Rainbow Drops and Parma Violets, has now given the youngster chief taster overalls and business cards. As well as sampling the sweets, he will also monitor their development at the company's factory in New Mills, Derbyshire. I don't know if it's the best job, but it's definitely the sweetest. An Australian manufacturer called for applications for what it claims could be the world's best job - condom tester. Durex marketing manager Sam White was hiring Australians over the age of 18 who could apply for one of 200 positions as a condom tester. Unfortunately the position is not paid, but successful applicants would receive a free $60 selection of Durex products and will be required to provide the company with honest feedback about the products' performance. Maybe the bonus is not that great, but one thing's for sure - it's a job where employees won't mind taking their work home and burning the midnight oil. Can you farm 200 gold an hour and hit level 80 in under 2 weeks? If the answer is yes, you can apply for the job that about 12 million players only dream about, as a Wow game tester! There are in fact several Blizzard jobs posted on their website. The Blizzard employment database has dozens of mmorpg jobs available, mostly WoW employment opportunities. They are currently hiring for several game tester positions for World of Warcraft, under the QA department. They are in particular looking for foreign language testers, so if you speak any other language besides English, don't hesitate to apply to start your Blizzard career. And, yeah, you will be required to play at least four hours a day. A six-year-old boy who wanted to become the director of York's National Railway Museum landed himself a job - as the director of fun. The ambitious youngster got a plum role at the National Railway Museum after applying to replace retiring boss Andrew Scott. Sam Pointon sent a handwritten letter headed "Application for director" asking for an interview at the centre, in York. The letter listed his credentials for the role, including his expertise on his train set. "I am only six but I think I can do this job," wrote Sam. Staff was so impressed they appointed Sam an honorary "Director of Fun" and his job will be to bosses how he thinks they can ensure the museum is the most fun place for kids to spend a day out. Ok, maybe this isn't the best job in the world for an adult, but it certainly rocks the world of a 6 year old. Google (GOOG) has hired two lucky young men to ride around France on dopey looking tricycles snapping up photos of historical sites that are inaccessible by car. This three-wheeler is a sight with its long pole holding nine cameras, a GPS, a computer and a generator. But the contraption tooling around the French capital needs all that gear to do its job - adding three-dimensional images to Google's Street View Maps. The riders, wearing Google tee-shirts and white helmets, are visiting well-known sites such as the Chateau de Versailles, west of Paris, the Jardin du Luxembourg on the city's Left Bank or Les Halles, in the busy centre of the French capital. |
| oddee.com/item_96873.aspx But, porno theater janitor is the worst job on the list. The main responsibility of the porno theater janitor is to take his mop and rag and wide up after each show is finished. Unlike a traditional theater, it's safe to assume that sticky substance under the chair is something other than Coca-Cola Classic! At least you get to see all that porn for free and you'll probably be very popular among your male friends, although this is probably not a job you want to talk about with your mother, or your wife for that matter. Guard duty at Buckingham Palace is regarded as one of the worst jobs in the British Army. Besides the fact that they have to stand for hours, no laughing allowed, they also have to look their best. Soldiers spend several hours each day cleaning and pressing their uniforms and polishing their boots in preparation for one of the many kit inspections that they are likely to face before taking up their positions outside one of the royal palaces. Any soldier whose turn-out is less than immaculate is likely to face a variety of punishments, such as extra guard duty. Researchers who want animal sperm -to study fertility or for artificial insemination-have a suite of attractive options: They can ram an electric probe up an animal's rectum, shove an artificial vagina onto the animal's penis, or simply do it the old-fashioned way-manual stimulation. The first option, electroejaculation, uses a priapic rectal probe to send electricity pulsing through the animal's nether regions. "All the normal excitatory signals that stimulate ejaculation, like touch, sight, sound and smell, can be replaced with the current from the probe," says Trish Berger, professor of animal science at the University of California, Davis. Electroejaculation generally requires anesthetizing the animal and is typically used on zoo dwellers. The other two methods-the artificial vagina, or AV, and the good old hand-require that animals be trained to the procedure. The AV-a large latex tube coated with warm lubricant -is used primarily to get sperm from dairy bulls (considered the most ornery and dangerous of bovines). when he mounts the steer with his forelegs, a brave technician, AV in hand, insinuates himself between the two aroused beasts and deftly redirects the bull's penis into the mock genitalia, which he must then hold tight while the bull orgasms. Alas, this isn't always absolutely effective: Everyone who's wielded an AV has had at least one close call, and more than a few have been sent to the hospital. The much safer "digital pressure" is used mostly with pigs, who are trained from an early age to mount a small bench while the researcher reaches around with a gloved hand and provides appropriate pleasure-er, pressure. Ramesh Sahu works in the sanitation department of Calcutta, cleaning out the city's sewers. On a regular basis, Rakesh sits in a low crouch at the bottom of a seven-foot-deep manhole, sloshing away in a swirl of human waste and sediment. Equipped with a hoe and a steel bar, and wearing only a pair of loose purple underpants, Rakesh empties the thick black sludge from a clogged sewer into a bucket that his fellow crew members hoist up and dump in the middle of a narrow road. A small mountain of decaying excrement accumulates between the manhole and a rickety wooden vegetable cart. Two co-workers reach down and yank Rakesh out by his sore, extended arms, his body splattered with putrid muck. At 27, with a wife, three young daughters and a monthly income of about $100, he has been a sewage worker for the Delhi Jal (Water) Board for the past 10 years. Scientists fighting malaria must study the biting habits of the mosquito that spreads it. In Brazil, that's the Anopheles Darlingi, which doesn't fall for the light or wind traps researchers use in Africa: this smart little sucker will come near scientists only when they offer themselves as bait. In the early evening, when mosquito activity is busiest, a mosquito dinner- researcher finds a nice buggy area and sets himself up inside a mosquito-netting tent with a gap at the bottom. Mosquitoes fly in low and get trapped inside, where the researcher sits stoically, sacrificing his skin to science. He needs focus only on his legs to keep him busy: whenever a mosquito chooses a drumstick dinner, the researcher draws it into a mouth tube and then expels it into a container. Veteran researcher Helge Zieler used to put himself on the menu twice a week. On his best evening, he caught 500 Anopheles in 3 hours. Meanwhile, of course, the skeeters feasted on his entire corpus-a grand total of about 3,000 bites, or an average of 17 per minute for 180 minutes on end. "It's not so bad," he says, explaining that his personal response to mosquito bites is an immediate itch that goes away naturally in a few minutes. Despite taking prophylactic chloroquine, Zieler developed a case that took him two years to shake. This job is a sort of combination of garbage collector and gastroenterologist, and arguably more disgusting than both put together. Although most people in polite society methodically avoid situations where they need to use a portable toilet, modern outhouses can be lifesavers. As gross as they can be, they'd be worse without the folks who clean them for a living. Using a tank and a vacuum wand, cleaners must suck up all the waste in a portable toilet. After picking up any stray toilet paper, they also wash down all surfaces that could possibly be soiled, including the walls. Usually, cleaning one portable toilet takes only a few minutes, and most workers clean from 10 to 60 of them a day. But it's not always that easy: Portable toilets that tip over require more damage control. Nevertheless, some cleaners grin and bear it -- and take home $50,000 a year. Odor judges are common in the research labs of mouthwash companies, where the halitosis-inflicted blow great gusts of breath in their faces to test product efficacy. But Minneapolis gastroenterologist Michael Levitt recently took the job to another level-or, rather, to the other end. Levitt paid two brave souls to indulge repeatedly in the odors of other people's farts. After each "episode of flatulence," Levitt syringed the gas into a discrete container, rigorously maintaining fart integrity. The odor judges then sat down with at least 100 samples, opened the caps one at a time, and inhaled robustly. As their faces writhed in agony, they rated just how noxious the smell was. British man Jon Hanson had what he describes as the worst job in his entire life: quality control on cat food. Test 1: Bury face in a huge tub of it and sniff it to make sure it's fresh. Test 2: Plunge arms in it up to the elbows and grope for bony bits and take them out. Test 3: Scoop up huge dollop of it, smear it flat on surface and prod it with fingers to test how much gristle is there. Roadkill collectors not only have the job of peeling the remains of dead creatures in decay off the road in various states, they also get to do it while braving oncoming traffic. He had to be caged-in in a car and drive around from one reserve to the next. Monkeys always climb on top of the car and usually enjoy a free ride for a while. At the exit of the monkey reserve is a zoo worker equipped with a stick. His duty is to prevent monkeys from leaving the reserve on a car. Imagine chasing monkeys in the glowing sun for eight hours. |