8/10    I'm the person who took care of my gf's sister's cat while she was
        away with the Air Force. In return, I asked her to check on my
        sons for a week while I was away. She skipped a day (and committed
        a lie of omission when she didn't say so but admitted it when
        questioned) and the upstairs bedroom was full of my sons' diarrhea all
        over everything (wooden floor, bookcase, blankets) - which is not
	...

7/8    if you loved someone, would you express her cats anal glands for her?
       it keeps dragging its ass around on the carpet, leaving stains.
        \_ I have owned a lot of cats, including 4 at present, and never
           had to deal with such unpleasantness. What did the vet say?
	...

11/14   Alright enough of this economic meltdown we're gonna die crap.
        It's time to inject humor and entertainment into motd. Below
        is How to Tell if Your Cat is Plotting to Kill You. Funny shit
        if you love cats (or hate cats):
        http://www.catswhothrowupgrass.com/kill.php
	...

7/19    I don't find lolcats to be that funny. I hate cats. Am I the
        only person in the world who thinks this way? Lolcats haters,
        please unite and speak up!
        \_ guess i wont be seeing you at ROFLCON
        \_ I don't think anyone on the motd thinks they are funny, hence the
           total lack of links to them. At the very least, everyone here
	...

2/26    Dogs lift up their legs to mark territories. The more pee and
        smellier the pee, the more they claim their territory. What
        are some common human behaviors that are similar to "marking"?
        \_ The best example I can think of is pimped up car playing super
           loud heart thumping music.
           \_ racist!
	...

2/26    As I raised my arms above my head and pulled the dress over me, I
        felt an eerie, unpleasant sensation that I could only describe as
        100 hundred cats licking me with tongues coated in glue.
        What the HELL kind of fabric is this? I began to sweat and itch even
        before the dress finished settling over my body. I felt trapped in a
        slippery mess of fabric suffocating every pore of my body. I yanked the
	...