11/2 In what can only be described as a surprise move, God has
officially announced His candidacy for the U.S. presidency. During
His press conference today, the first in over 4000 years, He is quoted
as saying, "I think I have a chance for the White House if I can just
get my campaign pulled together in time. I'd like to get this country
turned around; I mean REALLY turned around! Let's put Florida up
north for awhile, and let's get rid of all those annoying mountains
and rivers. I never could stand them!"
There apparently is still some controversy over the Almighty's
citizenship and other qualifications for the Presidency. God replied
to these charges by saying, "Come on, would the United States have
anyone other than a citizen bless their country?" |