www.bizarreingredients.co.uk/japan/a/heater/heater.htm
Cover artwork for the UK release of 'Battle Heater' Battle Heater (1989) (AKA - Battle Heater: Kotatsu) Directed by Joji Iida Cast: Pappara Kawai, Akira Emoto, Kaoru Okunuki, Tomita Yasuko, Komiya Takay asu At the beginning, the scene is set with a monologue: You cannot neglect old things. A van ploughs its way through torrential rain before suddenly skidding off the darkened road and spiralling down an incline. Coming to rest at the bottom of the slope the driver, an electrician called Hama, breathes a sigh of relief then glances over at the passenger next to him. Incredibly, Hamas colleague Furuchi is still dozing, so the former quickly rouses him (with an electric shock no-less) and they both hurry outside to pick up all the pieces of electrical hardware that have fallen out the back of their van. Gathering everything up again, they quickly become obsessed with finding one of the missing items - a heater called a kotatsu. Eventually they find the small, table-shaped device and, after checking it for any sign of damage, they lovingly carry it into the back of the van. Furuchi is overjoyed, telling Hama that he needs the heater to help warm up his freezing apartment. When the Kotatsu is finally resting in Furuchis apartment, it picks its moment to mysteriously lunge forward and hit him. A short while later, the elderly Mr Nakagawa knocks on the door and borrows Furuchis soldering iron. Mr and Mrs Nakagawa, who live in one of the nearby apartments, pride themselves with the fact that they have never caused trouble for anyone (something they keep repeating to each other again and again). As Nakagawa and Furuchi talk, a blood-curdling scream fills the air. The screams are coming from upstairs where Hideko Shinden and her otaku lover Osuma are trying to dispose of the body of Hidekos husband. Soon after this Furuchi attempts to get the power supply working on the kotatsu so that he can finally heat his apartment. As he attempts to fix it, the punk band living next door crank up the amplifiers and start jamming. Amdist the scrappy improvisation, Furuchi grabs his screwdriver and tries to remove a small metal emblem stuck in the side of the heater. Straining to remove the silver seal, his exertions eventually cause him to fly backwards. Unfortunately, the screwdriver also flies backwards - right through the thin wall, into the next room and straight into the leg of one of the guitarists. The music stops abruptly and after a few seconds there is a knock at the door. The band burst in - minus their leader Sabii - and a panicking Furuchi pleads with them hysterically as they pin him to the floor. In the ensuing struggle the heater trips one of the gang up and he falls face first into a box of nails and screws. A shrieking Sabii (using his head to blast through the partition between the rooms) adds the final manic layer to the scene. With only his head sticking through the wall, he spares Furuchi from a pasting on the condition that he takes a message from the band to his girlfriend. The gang eventually leave the room and Furuchi hurriedly exits as well, to go and call his girlfriend from the main hall in the apartment block. With the room now empty, the mains power lead on the heater starts to rear up like a snake and sets about exploring the area. Eventually, the wandering power cable finds a suitable power supply and the heater starts to sap power at a huge rate. The power drain results in the band (who have resumed their impromptu jamming session) struggling to keep their amplifiers going. Meanwhile, in one of the apartments downstairs, the Nakagawas simply console themselves yet again with the fact that for all the years theyve lived in the block they have never harmed anyone. A few seconds later their clock explodes and an electrical cloud fries the pair of them in their beds. An elaborate pulley system they have constructed kicks in and two pieces of white cloth are pulled over the lifeless faces of the Nakagawas. Furuchi heads back to his apartment and grabs a duvet cover which he drapes over the heater. Settling down underneath it and getting ready to go to sleep, he is completely oblivious to the huge many-toothed creature that is menacing his legs. Just when it looks like its too late, Furuchi noisily slumps forwards onto the heater and the monster withdraws back into the heater. After a few moments he moves to one side of the room and opens the doors to a little shrine, dedicated to the God of Electricity. As Hama sits and prays the shrine flashes light all around him. The undertaker in charge of the Nakagawas funeral visits the apartment block, telling himself that he will do his best to honour the last wishes of the deceased. Clutching a bundle of letters to deliver to people in the building, he first makes his way to the Shindens apartment. Hideko is out so Osuma is left to try and get rid of the unwanted caller. Opening the door ajar Osuma uses the dead husbands head wrapped in a blanket as a disguise. The undertaker is perplexed by the pitiful, lifeless face but just as he becomes suspicious something isnt right, Hideko returns. She quickly grabs the letter and pushes her way into the apartment. As she does this she explains to the undertaker that her husband is ill and with that slams the door in his face. The next letter is addressed to Furuchi so the undertaker ventures downstairs to find an empty apartment. As the door is open he ventures inside, aiming to leave the envelope on top of the cloth covered heater in front of him. After a few seconds deliberation he decides to wait and sits down at the heater. A short while after this he is dragged screaming underneath the demonic kotatsu. Furuchi gives the strange silver seal from the heater to his girlfriend as a gift. During their meeting he also passes on the letter from Sabii, opening this she finds a pop-up card with a message. The card asks her to be at Furuchis apartment block for a meeting at 6 oclock in the evening the following day. Meanwhile, the kotatsu has started exploring the apartment block, causing as much mayhem as a walking, razor toothed heater is capable of... Comment: Even in the often deep and twisted realm of Japanese Horror there are still times when the humble viewer simply wants to kick back and let the old noggin indulge in a spot of bubblegum chewing. Finding myself in this position recently, I was fortunate to have what appeared to be the perfect stick of chewing gum in the shape of Joji Iidas Battle Heater: Kotatsu. This is one film that promised to be utterly inane and it certainly didnt disappoint on that score at least. Basically, Battle Heater is as pure an example of typically exaggerated 80s Horror Comedy or, perhaps more accurately, pure Eastern Horror farce as youre likely to get. A blank canvas splattered with throwaway humour and absolutely anything else that can be thrown into the pot to guarantee a handful of disposable chuckles. It is a deliberately messy, polish-free recipe creating a visual feast that certainly isnt going to be to everyones taste. A cranky beast full of manic performances, daft scripting, dodgy stop-motion work and a downright weird premise concerning a demonic heater! In terms of straight laughs, the pick of the gags in this one occur within the first half-hour. My favourite sequence is the first time that we meet Osuma and Hideko, with the former screaming hysterically at the upright torso of Hidekos murdered husband and Hideko herself standing at the kitchen sink chopping up more parts of the dead body. Also high in the laughter stakes is the sequence showing the demise of the Nakagawas, culminating in their home-made pulley system doing its job. Another scene of note occurs near the end of the film, when the kotatsu polishes off what is left of the corpse of Hidekos husband. In certain isolated sequences in Battle Heater there is an effortless, totally disposable delirium to it all frustratingly, this only occurs sporadically throughout. But to be sure, the best laughs in Battle Heater are definitely those tinged with that surreal, typically Japanese sense of black humour. While Battle Heater kicks off well, t...
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