2/6     My brother got married recently and they insisted they didn't want
        anything and refused to register anywhere.  Obviously I have to get
        something, but since they're poor the most practical thing would be
        cash.  If I have lots of disposable income and make $X/yr, what is a
        good amount for a wedding present?
        \_ make an Indecent proposal.
        \_ $X
        \_ Not knowing any of you, I'd say a few hundred bucks.  Don't shame
           them by giving a large amount.  By not accepting anything they're
           saying to the world, "This is true love, we're not getting married
           to scam you out of some gifts"
           \_ agree.  couple hundred bucks is good enough.  anything more than
              that is going to be too offensive... unless you sure he doesn't
              mind.
        \_ how poor are they? i'm sure there's something that he could use,
           be it a DSL subscription, or a computer, or porn DVDs (being a
           computer nerd, it makes sense to get him those things) or even
           something like repairs for his beat up corolla. That way, you're
           not giving him charity (which he already said he doesn't want),
           you're thinking about him (and his wife, i guess). you could even
           get him something like a Safeway gift card, and say it's because
           you didn't know what kind champagne he liked.
        \_ Miss Manners says that's it's rude to tell people that you don't
           want gifts; it's the giver's choice what to give.  If your
           brother wants to be insulted at generosity, that's his problem.
             -tom
           \_ Who cares about MM? What does Emily Post have to say?
           \_ Ironic that you'd be a MM reader.
              \_ Have you read Miss Manners at all?  She does the best
                 smack-downs of any columnist this side of Savage Love.  -tom
                 \_ Yes, I have.  As I said.  Ironic.
        \_ give them stock or a savings bond.  i got the latter several
           times as a kid and it's good karma.
           \_ A small quantity of stock is just a pain in the as for
              somebody who isnt an invester. Just give cash if you are
              somebody who isnt an investor. Just give cash if you are
              thinking this route or a gift certificate to Amazon.
              In fact just ignore all the other advice except maybe the
              trip if you have a good idea there and get them Amazon.
              \_ that makes a lot of sense.  i like amazon certificates. -pp
                 \- yes i know that. i get an AMAZONG CREDIT for all
                    my associate who have new children.
        \_ A good gift is a trip somewhere. Where are they honeymooning?
        \_ If they're serious about not receiving gifts and you're serious
           about giving, you can always donate money to some reasonable
           charity in their name.
        \_ give them stock or something.  i never did something like that,
           but it sounds like it'd work great if i were into that.  savings
           bonds are for kids, but might be appropriate if you think they're
           addiction-prone or won't know how to sell stock.  they'll probably
           realize they can take you out for a nice dinner if they ever sell.
           \_ I got married 6 months ago and suggested people do this. -bz
        \_ How about just taking your brother out, telling him over a beer
           that you'd like to do something nice for them (it is possible to
           tell someone that you are financially well off and would like to
           share in a non-arrogant way) and just ask him straight-out in
           private what he'd like?  And Miss Manners can bite my ass.  -John
           \_ He lives 300 miles away, makes himself difficult to contact,
              and has been delicately asked this a few times already. -op
              \_ Just a thought -- if they intend to procreate, and
                 depending on how much you want to spend, consider opening
                 a trust fund (cash, bonds, whatever) for the kid.  -John
        \_ A few casino chips
        \_ Toaster!