www.theregister.co.uk/2005/04/01/steve_jobs_joins_ikea -> www.theregister.co.uk/2005/04/01/steve_jobs_joins_ikea/
Andrew Orlowski in San Francisco Published Friday 1st April 2005 09:54 GMT IKEA's flatpack days may soon be a distant memory, as Apple and Pixar fou nder Steve Jobs turns to his latest challenge. Inter IKEA Systems BV wil l employ Jobs as "acting CEO", from next month. The technology icon will maintain his twin CEO roles at Apple Computer Inc. but w ill also take command with a wide-ranging brief at the retail giant. For the technology guru, it's just another job, but for the Swedish furnish ing franchise, it's a massive gamble. IKEA had a turnover of 13 billion last year, and has over 200 stores worldwide. For Jobs, who has no furniture at all in his Palo Alto house, it's an opp ortunity to reinvent an industry once again. Exclusive mock-ups of his f irst designs have been obtained by The Register. Jobs has convinced the Apple board to s econd the computer company's award-winning design team to work for IKEA, and in a unique licensing agreement, the results will bear the Apple lo go. Jobs' new designs win over a sceptical Swedish boardroom In magical metal furniture we trust: Jobs wins over a sceptical Swedish b oardroom Amongst the most controversial ideas to be introduced is a radical twist on a classic concept, the "Torquemada". Intended to be the heart of the new IKEA home, the Torquemada brings a Jobs twist to the very idea of si tting comfortably. Straight to the point: IKEA/Apple's welcoming Torquemada Steve wants you to sit comfortably... "Before me," writes Walt Mossberg of the Wall Street Journal in a draft o btained by The Register, "is the most beautiful chair I have seen in 25 years of sitting on chairs. punned the New York Times punning techno logy pundit, David Pogue. And most controversially, is the "Bn" - a titanium object in the shape of a crucifix which emits a high pitched whine when approached. The UN's development agency has already purchased 500 for use in Africa, where experts believe it can end droughts. IKEA's The 'Bono' turns desert into a river, say sources close to IKEA Jobs has also plans to revolutionize IKEA store layout. The successful de nse walkthrough floorplan will be discarded for a new, open plan approac h based on Apple's retail stores. Instead of offering shoppers a choice of thousands of products, IKEA stores will offer just three to begin wit h: the Bono, the Torquemada and the "Fukka".
In every Mac home, a Waenka To the relief of many, the flatpack self-assembly aesthetic will be repla ced by high margin, ready-assembled furniture. Packaging for a wardrobe codenamed "Waenka" wardrobe, obtained by The Register, shows that Apple' s attention to detail seen in its lavish product packaging has not been lost. And don't expect the famous IKEA canteen to escape the Jobs makeover. Out go the celebrated Swedish meatballs - Jobs is a fruitarian - to be repl aced by a thin miso soup garnished by a solitary piece of carrot or tofu : food best enjoyed on while sitting on a "Torquemada". Jobs is believed to have won over the phlegmatic Swedes with his legendar y charm. "It's time this f***ing business of mass mutha****ing furnishin g moved from the f***ing Altair era of f***ing self-f***ing assembly, to the Apple II era," he told the board.
|
http://csua.com/feed/