3/31    Nearly every metal object in my office keeps zapping me with static
        charges every other time I touch it. Is there something wrong with
        me or my office?
        \_ Your carpets could just suck, check the soles of your shoes (I
           think leather is a bit better), maybe the humidity is too low,
           or maybe it's the CIA brain implant malfunctioning.  -John
        \_ Hold a key or a coin and use it to touch other metal objects before
           you touch them with bare hards.
        \_ Make sure to include some pins in your tinfoil hat, pointing outward.
           The sharp points will dissipate the static charge back into the
           air for you.
        \_ There could be problems with the grounding in the office.