7/20    Is it appropriate to give a gift certificate as a wedding present
        instead of the actual items on the registry?
        \_ Get the groom something he really needs: a prenup. If
           someone else already got him that, get him the next
           best thing, pre-paid consultation with the most brutal
           and inhumane lawyer you can afford. Of all the gifts
           it will be the one that helps him the most later in
           his life.
           \_ Go bitter divorced guy, go!
              \_ Do you ever wonder if the bitter divorced guy's
                 story is just way too unbelieveable to be true?
                 Maybe he's just making it all up. Maybe he's
                 a she whose trying to keep the good men of the
                 csua from reporducing. Maybe I've watched one
                 to many XFiles eps.
              \_ Ever notice how most men wear black (or other
                 dark colors to weddings)? Its because men know
                 that marriage is a time of mourning. Yet another
                 innocent fool has lost his life to the beguiling
                 charms of a bloodsucking woman.
                 Notice how all the women are either happy or are
                 crying tears of joy. Its because they are overjoyed
                 that yet another woman was able to dupe a man who
                 will be stuck caring for her as long as he lives.
        \_ you know what's a really good wedding present? caller id.
           also known as inlaw identification.
           \_ a better present is the prenup suggested above. Inlaws
              can be handled, a wife suing for divorce because she
              says that your are a bigoted, wife beating, child
              molesting, spousal rapist dead beat cannot be handled
              without a good strong prenup and a vicious merciless
              lawyer.
        \_ Personal check in a red envelope. You'd understand if you've
           ever been a real part of a wedding.
           \_ That's only for Chinese, isn't it?
              \_ works for jew weddings too.
                 \_ especially if the amount of money is a multiple
                    of 18. --chris
                 \_ Women and friends come and go, money is forever.
                    Why waste it on an obviously live destroying event
                    like a wedding?
              \_ works for korean weddings too -- white envelopes.
                 money/cash is a very welcome gift -- either to pay wedding
                 bills, to spend on a honeymoon (my friend who is neither
                 jewish or asian loved the extra cash for her honeymoon), or
                 just to buy something that is not on a wedding
                 registry. --chris
                 \_ Cash is a welcome gift. The groom will need all
                    the money he can earn, beg, borrow or steal to
                    keep his wife happy, esp. after she sues for
                    divorce and he realizes that she is nothing but
                    a cold cruel opportunistic bitch.
        \_ Yes, but make sure you've been hinted for some nookie with one
           of the bridesmaids|groomsmen.
           \_ What's a nookie?
                \_ ask yermom
                \_ It's kinda like a cookie, but different...
        \_ I went to 10 weddings last year (2000 was wedding season) and I
           can tell you that yes, gift certs are very much appreciated when
           you want to veer away from the registry list. A lot of new couples
           set up registry for items that are nice-to-have, not must-have. With
           the gift cert, obviously they can get something they really want. It
           carries equal weight with the material gifts. - jthoms
              \_ So are these gift certs to go see a lawyer about a
                 postnup agreement? If not the gift certs were wasted.
                 And you went to 10 weddings? How did you stop yourself
                 from crying for all those poor men who threw away thier
                 lives, thier futures and thier fortunes?
           \_ well, in that case, what about giving cash? or checks? or PayPal
              payments?
              \_ How much would you spend on a couple if the person is one
                 of your 5 closest friends?  $100?  $500?  $1000?
                 \_ all depends. If he has a house, lots of options and a
                    pretty wife I'd give him a $15 Mikasa vase. If he is poor
                    and his wife is ugly, I'd give him $500. Then of course
                    you gotta realize that when he gets married he will no
                    longer be your close friend.
                 \_ if it was a close friend I probably would just buy him/her
                 \_ As a bridesmaid, I spent close to $1000...and in those
                    instances, I gave cash gifts closer to $200.  For close
                    friends (where I was not a bridesmaid -- e.g., husband's
                    close friends or parents' close friends), I gave closer to
                    $500 cash/checks.  Thank goodness wedding season is coming
                    to a close for us.  Baby showers are next. -chris
                    \_ Wow. You must be loaded or stupid. I wouldn't even
                                        \_ Try both.
                                           \_ What a combo. Its people
                                              like this that keep the
                                              economy aflot. I hope
                                              she and her friends keep
                                              spending like, my portfolio
                                              sure could use a boost.
                       give my brother $1000, let alone a "friend".
                       Women and Friends come and go, money is forever.
                        \_ You may want to consider your economic class
                           standing compared to Chris' before you babble.
                           \_ I know the value of money. It seems that
                              Chris does not. Perhaps you should consider
                              that there are rich yet frugal alums who
                              read the motd.
                                \_ Or maybe she understands it better
                                   than you.
                                   \_ She's spending $1000, $500 left
                                      and right. Clearly she does not
                                      understand the value of money.
                                      Waste not, want not.
                                      \_ "left and right" how many weddings
                                         does one attend?  and i think that
                                         gifts for friends are important.  you
                                         my 'friend,' are not going to get
                                         any gifts anytime soon.
                                         \_ Personally I prefer to buy the
                                            things I need with my own money.
                        \_ orr...maybe i didn't post this!  duh! --chris
                    a gift.
                    \_ So how much is reasonable to spend on the gift?
                        \_ It depends on what you can afford, how close you
                           are to the recipients, etc.  No one expects you
                           to blow a large chunk of your net worth on a gift.
                    \_ If it was a close friend I wouldn't let him make the
                       biggest mistake of his entire life by getting married.
                       That's the best gift you can give; saving him from
                       a fate worse than death.