3/20    I own the new iPad. Behold, my enormous penis!
        \_ Huh?
           \_ He's obviously got it backwards.  He got the iPad
              *because* he's got a tiny rod and needs something else
              to boost his perceived self-esteem.
              \_ Ding ding ding! (but no dong) -OP
        \_ I am going to get one for my wife.
           \_ The new iPad or the enormous penis? :-)  -- !OP
              \_ I would be happy to get her both, but she would probably
                 only enjoy the iPad.

3/20    "New York Woman Blinded by Shopping Cart Dropped by Teens Forgives
        Them"  http://www.csua.org/u/vu4 (gma.yahoo.com)
        "One boy is serving six to 18 months in a non-secure facility in
        Westchester, while the other is doing six to 16 months in a
        therapeutic group home."
        What kind of justice is this?  Those thugs could have easily killed
        multiple people.
        BTW, what degree of manslugher is it for someone who discharges a
        firearm at random direction on the streets and kills people?
        \_ If you run over someone in a crosswalk with your SUV, you will get
           away with a traffic ticket at most.