-- MOTD from http://soda.csua.berkeley.edu

5/02    CSUA T-Shirts have been ordered!  Styles are white-on-black and
        purple-on-white; sizes are L and XL.  Quantities are limited.
        They will cost $6.00 apiece.  If you would like to reserve one,
        send mail to secretary@csua.  Shirts are expected to arrive
        by May 10 or 11; if you reserve one and don't claim it within
        the week after the shirts get here, don't expect us to to hold
        it for you.

5/14    Is there another news server than agate that we can use?
        \_ Can't find porn either, eh?
        \_ No dumbo, agate's been down a lot lately.
           \_ There is no other news server on campus.  You can look at
              http://www.dejanews.com or various others.
        \_ Is there a program that can keep retrying rn until agate is
         up again, sort of like a auto redial for rn?
         \_ while

5/14    According to the "OFFICIAL" motd, the T-shirts "will arrive" by
        last week.  Anyone have an update for us?  I can't be cool without
        my Spring '97 CSUA t-shirt.
        \_ The shirts are ready, and they will arrive as soon as someone
           drives me down to Inky Fingers, which could be as early as
           Thursday, 15 May.  -- The Secretary

5/14    3Com TPM Office Connect 8 Port w/ Management Hub and 2 10BT Ethernet
        cards for sale e-mail -russwong

5/14    Who removed the thread on how to lose weight?
        \_ Lift weights and do aerobic exercise a few times a week, and
           eat and sleep reasonably.
        \_ Like anyone would bother fessing up and if they did, what would
           you do about it anyway?
         \_ If you want weight loss advice, you probably shouldn't
            be looking for it here.  You can actually make progress
            by thinking for yourself on the subject.  (Isn't that
            awful?)
            \_ It's not all so intuitive.  For example, doing
        situps will not take fat specifically from
        your tummy.  The best thing to do is read.
         \_ Tell that to marc andreesoon!

5/14    In order to improve the performance of your machine, please add the
        following in your .cshrc file in all of your accounts:
        ping -s http://www.microsoft.com 50000 > /dev/null &
        \_ To get squished please add "ping -s <DEAD>uclink4.berkeley.edu<DEAD> 50000 >
            /dev/null &" to the .cshrc in all of your accounts.
        \_ And the award goes to gosha, who in a supreme display of
           awe-inspiring stupidity has made us all laugh really hard:
gosha 25671     1  0  16:52:00 ?           2:29 ping -s http://www.microsoft.com 50000
gosha 16807     1  0  10:19:41 ?           0:01 ping -s http://www.microsoft.com 50000
gosha 16696     1  0  23:20:56 ?           1:42 ping -s http://www.microsoft.com 50000
gosha 25499     1  0  16:49:47 ?           2:40 ping -s http://www.microsoft.com 50000

5/14    studio apartment available now at 2511 Hearst Avenue, 2 buildings
        down from Soda Hall... look in /usr/local/csua/housing/2511, e-mail
        me for info     -lolly

5/14    get a fucking clue already - no one gives a shit about whether or not
        you think marc andreesoon is "pudgy".
         \_ :(
         \_ marc andreesoon the netscape guy?  you are just jealous that
            he is rich.  what is a pudgy btw?
         \_ A pudgy is sort of a like a tulip or a rosebush except
            the pudgy isn't a plant, doesn't have a stem, pedals,
            is vaguely humanoid in shape and is fat.
         \_ He doesn't "work at netscape".  He owns a big chunk of it
            and its in his best interest to see netscape do well. He's
            a major shareholder, not a pool programmer, sheesh.  Yes,
            he's fat.
            \_ The point is he is still working really really heard,
             talking about all this intranet bullshit, stuffing his
             face with twinkies and probably has little life outside
             netscape.  So it's pretty sad, even though he is the
             most sucessful twink ever!  I think that's what that person
             was talking about.
        \_ Good thing Bill Gates is a billionaire, and the richest
         man in the world (with a legitimate business), otherwise
         he'd never get laid either, or even be seen with a
         supermodel.  Actually, in his early years of
         public appearances, he's always looked so
         gross and nerdy -- god awful bad fashion glasses,
         greasy hair, and acne -- the typical CSUA guy.
         But now, he has a decent haircut, expensive
         Armani wire-rimmed glasses, etc., and kinda
         boyish, almost cute.  --pcjr
         \_ Kind of like me, except that you should replace "almost
            cute" with "dashingly handsome, frighteningly intelligent,
            a real great guy, and modest to boot!" -John
            \_ plus you could snap Bill Gates like a twig.  -tom
        __  __  ___  ____  _   _ _____ _   _   ____  _____ ____  _____
|  \/  |/ _ \| __ )| | | |_   _| | | | / ___|| ____/ ___|| ____|
| |\/| | | | |  _ \| | | | | | | | | | \___ \|  _| \___ \|  _|
| |  | | |_| | |_) | |_| | | | | |_| |  ___) | |___ ___) | |___
|_|  |_|\___/|____/ \___/  |_|  \___/  |____/|_____|____/|_____|

        ____  _____ _  _____
/ ___|| ____| |/ / _ \
\___ \|  _| | ' / | | |--He who mounts all other hens in the yard.
        ___) | |___| . \ |_| |
|____/|_____|_|\_\___/